is this depression?
it’s anticipatory grief
it’s the loss of a future
it’s here-and-now grief
it’s a pandemic
it’s anger for having seen this coming
it’s despair for our chances of surviving
it’s regret for all i couldn’t do
it’s fear for my loved ones
it’s deep ambivalence about being alive
it’s exhaustion like a thirst in my bones
it’s numbness
it’s a muting of life
it’s an iron veil
it’s a yoke around my neck
it’s amorphous
it’s inescapable
it’s my new normal
it’s all i got
Hey hey patrons, This is the second edition of ish I read this week-ish--and it's actually on time! I had my mea culpas all lined up thinking I'd have to do this tomorrow but here I sit. This will be a shorter edition for two reasons: 1) I've been pretty miserable...
Good afternoon, beloveds! So, I hadn't picked up a book for a few months before the beginning of this one, depressed and preoccupied with looking for a job as I've been. Around the Witches' New Year I started to move out of that deep oceanic depression and into a...
i was going to write about all the difficult lessons i'm learning this scorpio season about fluid boundaries and respecting others' wholeness at the same time as you respect your own. but then i crashed back into depression after turning my attention to financial...
this isn't about anything, i just need to get some shit down. still don't have a job/income. i'm in a "hiring process" rn for this remote writing job and i've been putting a lot of my energies towards manifesting that. but it is taking waaaay longer than i think i...